Ilang tulog nalang, pasko nanaman.
Chirstmas is so near and I still haven't felt it. When I was a kid, I started feeling it as soon as Halloween ended, but now I'm just so caught up in the stress that I've been living my days just to get by. Yeah, that's what you realize after a day of prayer. My week's been hell. Actually, maybe this whole month, but the past few days have really topped it. I don't know if it's disappointement in others or ultimately self-disappointment for expecting otherwise. I found myself thinking how much I wished I could go back to the good old days because back then, I rarely felt these for reasons that maybe only I know. I never used to understand why things like these happened to people then. When I grew up, I realized that people are just really different. Maybe what makes it so sad is that I can't really share it with anyone because it just puts me in a spot, which I would rather not do. Maybe that's why I'm a sponge that never gets squeezed, but I've had worse days. Sometimes people don't realize this cause I try to be happy, but damn it, sometimesI woke up early yesterday after one of those really late nights to go to a day of prayer. At first, I was cursing under my breath because why the hell did I have to wake up so early, but it turned out for the better. I got to spend time alone with myself and reflect on my other blessings. Then I got to go to conession and hear mass. By the time I got to Butterfly for lunch, it was time for Sunday club and I felt like crap. I was so sleepy, groggy, head hurting, throwing up feeling. By the time we got home, I did throw up and went to bed at 9:30. Well, I feel much better, but I still need to heal myself for the coming Christmas.
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